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1. Heave ho!

Alice threw the looking glass
which was really quite revealing.
But Alice rarely thought things through
and aimed to break glass ceilings.

Alice threw the looking glass
the Hatter grew in sanity
at badly hurled reflective bling
and uttered gross profanity.

Alice threw the looking glass,
the Red Queen quickly ducked.
The shattered glass went everywhere,
said Alice, that’s me fucked!


The people stared at Alice crossly
critics to a man and seething
rules are rules and must apply
your reckless fling does not comply.

We set the rules of flinging bling
we set the ceiling own the floor
we rule not you and we are meaner
we call you out you Miss demeanour

Alice smiled with roguish knowing
the girl can throw and throw she will
so sod your rules I’ll take a pass
I love the sound of breaking glass.


Silence in court, the old judge said
his face a purple shade of red.
You stand accused you whipper snapper
of nursery crimes that really matter.

Here’s evidence and tales of woe
of courting condemnation now
accused of hiding guilty feelings
the truth will out in these proceedings.

Our hero victims broken shell
tells tales of Miss behaving well
so did you did or did you not transgress
with malice Alice come now confess.

You stand accused by good Kings men
who stand together to sound condemn
You stand accused you little numpty
of pushing over Humpty Dumpty.

The wall was high and Humpty perched
with manly soldiers for support
the hero of the marching men
he waved in solidarity when

in sudden scenes of disarray
the chaos covered up foul play
when tragedy struck down in shame
what say you shameful feisty dame?


Said Alice, boldly looking quite askance
confronting bullies with wicked glance
your accusations are quite odd
of course I pushed the silly sod!

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